Putting Lessons Learned to Good Use

This picture was taken nine years ago this week. On this day, I graduated with a Master’s degree from Texas A&M University. This is a time when our lives turned in a completely different direction—a direction we previously had not seen coming.

When I started the program, Brandon and I were both working full-time, we had three young kids, and he was in the finishing stages of his dissertation for his PhD. We were both successful in our careers and we were looking forward to those careers continuing to grow.

Not long after I started my Master’s program, we were very excited to learn we were pregnant. We had always hoped to “have a big family,” but, until this time, we had put off having more kids. We had been trying for several months to get pregnant and were so happy to know we were expecting.

And then we had our first miscarriage.

That devastating experience is by far one of the most difficult times we have ever faced.

Not long after, we learned I was pregnant again. We were so excited. Excited and nervous and bound up in an anticipation we had never felt before. I was so grateful to be pregnant again, and with each passing day I was even more thankful for our growing family than I had ever been before.

At some point in all of this, I took stock of our busy lives and our hectic schedules. I looked at how we were living versus how how I once dreamed our lives could be. I knew I didn’t want to take a single day for granted. I didn’t want to take our kids or the family we had built for granted. I wanted to slow down and to pour everything we could into ourselves and our beautiful children.

Finally, Brandon and I sat down and I asked him to look at our day-to-day. To look at the time we leave in the morning, the time we return, our evening commitments, our ringing phones, our dinging emails. To look at all of the time we were giving in other places than in our own home. Then I asked him to picture all of that but with a new baby in our arms.

It was in that moment that we decided I would resign my job and stay home with our kids. It was in that moment we didn’t look at the dollar signs or the next career move or how this would look on a resume. It was in that moment my nearly-completed Master’s degree didn’t matter. It was in that moment the trajectory of our lives forever changed.

I did resign from my job, and a few months later, I did finish up my Master’s degree. Our little Lucia was born one week after I finished all of my coursework and just 18 days before I walked at graduation. To be honest, I think pulling off walking at the graduation was more difficult than all of the work that went in to actually earning the degree! But getting this degree took work and commitment from the entire family. Yes, Brandon and I had to work together for me to finish, and our kids worked hard, too. They made just as many sacrifices as we did and it was important to them all to see me walk across that stage.

I think on that day, I was most happy afterwards, once we were back home, our new baby back in my arms, our family gathered around our table celebrating. We were celebrating all that we had accomplished together, but we were also celebrating the new journey that laid before us.

Little did we know then, that would be Brandon’s last year as a superintendent. Making the decision for me to stay home with our kids led to Brandon making big career changes that we had hoped would also give us more time together as a family. Little by little, this was the beginning of us thinking more about time and less about money.

In some ways, I never have used my Master’s degree. But I can assure you, I have put good use to all of the lessons learned along the way!