It’s Okay to Quit

It was just a few weeks before Thanksgiving break, and right before the last home football game, when our collegiate cheerleader daughter broke down in tears and told us she was ready to quit the team.

To be honest, it was a bit of a shock at first, but then she went on to explain how the sport she once loved was no longer what it used to be to her. What once brought her so much joy and brought out the best in her, came to be something she dreaded and was starting to take its toll.

If there is one thing in life we have all learned—she knows it and we know it—it is okay to quit.

We know this may be an unpopular opinion. But we recognize the difference between giving up and quitting.

To us, giving up is when something you love becomes difficult and you begin to question if you have it in you to finish. Giving up is when you really want the end results but feel like you may not have the endurance to get to the goal. We don’t let each other give up. We cheer each other on to be their best and to do their best and to attain everything in life they truly desire.

But quitting. Quitting is something else.

There are times in life when you look up and the path you are on no longer serves you. Your goals change. Your purpose shifts. Your values tell you to go in a different direction.

Looking back on our own story, we have quit plenty of times.

When Brandon worked hard toward the superintendency and after a few years it was taking a toll on him and our family that we did not expect—our hearts told us it was time for a change.

When teaching once brought me the most joy but then eventually took more out of me than I was willing to give—my heart let me know it was time to give in other ways.

When the suburbs felt like the right move to make but then felt like a place we did not belong— we searched our hearts for where to go next.

When pushing our kids towards societal goals and expectations felt like what we were supposed to do but was really driving our family apart—we followed our hearts to focus on what is most important to us.

We know when things feel right and when they don’t. We know when we want something and we know when it is time to make a change.

We also know quitting is hard. For our daughter, she committed years to the sport, was ecstatic when she made the team, and was doing very well. But in the end, this was no longer for her and no longer a part of her plans.

So she quit.

We have been so proud of her all along this journey—proud every time she pushed through and never gave up. And now, we are so proud of her for quitting knowing what is in her heart has changed.

The truth is, we know our own hearts and we know deep down what we want. Sometimes it means we keep going, and sometimes it means we have a change of plans. And that’s okay. Let’s encourage one another to never give up and let’s remind each other it’s okay to quit.